Conscious Relating

Artwork by the incredible Alexander Grey.

Once you are on your spiritual path, usually after having an awakening of sorts, often due to a breakdown of some kind brought on by a trauma, loss, grief, ending of sorts you are never to be the same again.

Your journey will effect all relationships in your life. It may be hard to be around other people for long periods of time who have no awareness, little compassion for themselves or others, are not acknowledging their own limitations as well as realising that relating can be a direct mirror for all you need to look at in your own life.

If you actively commit to a conscious relationship you are in for a ride in my experience. Myself and my partner made the decision to be in a conscious relationship and have both found it the hardest yet most rewarding relationship we’ve had. There have been many times where we have nearly walked away, having had enough of the deepest pain it has caused but luckily we have stuck it out and now feel we are in an incredible place, unknown before to either of us. Although we are also well aware that things could change at any moment when the next layer is shed in order for us to go deeper into our healings.

It’s as if the universe heard your decision and gives you a fast track to shed through your karma and ancestral healing. This fast track is likely to be extremely tumultuous, painful and powerful.

If you are able to commit to it, understanding that you are receiving gifts within this relationship you can transform many lifetimes of pain and relating problems.

Little nuggets of wisdom will constantly present. Your choice as to whether you feel them from an ego perspective, get triggered and project. Alternatively allowing you to see what you need to look at within yourself, to then accept and heal. To see each other for the whole person you are. To bring issues up with softness and respect at appropriate times and talk things through. Remembering we are all feminine and masculine. Trying to balance ourselves from the inside, honouring the yin and yang, when to give and when to receive. This helps to create that sacred union within, so we can create the sacred union without.

These conscious relationships are especially important if you wish to have children so not to pass these issues on and thus creating real evolution for human kind.

Thank you, Ayan Mukherjee @ayan_mukherjee_ for this wonderful graphic about intergenerational trauma:

It is a relationship for a Warrior and Warrioress. To become King and Queen. If you do this work you have the opportunity to become sovereign, all within a safe loving container. You may also think you’re going insane in the process and wonder if you should be alone and single where you can be comfortable and easily not see your flaws. If you decide to separate you are likely to find the exact same patterns play out again in your next relationship so if you can, utilise the connection you’ve already made and transmute those old patterns.

I do not know the artist to give this credit so please get in touch if you know who created this

To bring truthfulness and authenticity to the table in a way that you never previously thought could be possible is the key to conscious relating. To allow yourself to be offended and upset but then look beyond the hurt as to the underlying wound. To then discuss the wound with your partner and ask for help in recognising when that part of you is acting from the wound to help to love that part of you.

Although obviously this kind of relating is also relevant to any friendship, family connection or acquaintance. If you both consent to creating a vulnerable, open, honest relationship then it can be a life changing chance to create a new way of communicating which will impact all your communications.

I also want to say any kind of abuse is NOT the same as ‘doing the work’ so if that’s playing out in your relationship please walk away as no one should be treated in this way.

Are you ready to really delve deep on your healing journey? If so find someone willing to have a real conscious relationship with you.